比尔因为妈妈带回的僵尸病毒变成了僵尸小孩,但仍维持着一个平凡学生的形象,但他的游戏水平却突飞猛进……弗雷德·佩里编著的《僵尸小孩日记(2野营惊魂记)》是一本让你看了笑掉大牙的搞笑日记,一本让你感受北美纯正英语的轻松小说,荣登《纽约时报》畅销书排行榜。
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书名 | 僵尸小孩日记(2野营惊魂记) |
分类 | 少儿童书-儿童文学-外国儿童文学 |
作者 | (美国)弗雷德·佩里 |
出版社 | 福建少年儿童出版社 |
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简介 | 编辑推荐 比尔因为妈妈带回的僵尸病毒变成了僵尸小孩,但仍维持着一个平凡学生的形象,但他的游戏水平却突飞猛进……弗雷德·佩里编著的《僵尸小孩日记(2野营惊魂记)》是一本让你看了笑掉大牙的搞笑日记,一本让你感受北美纯正英语的轻松小说,荣登《纽约时报》畅销书排行榜。 内容推荐 弗雷德·佩里编著的《僵尸小孩日记(2野营惊魂记)》讲述了:比尔准备参加一年一度“敢摁节”电脑游戏大赛,并决定挑战世界电玩冠军,没想到此时他的班级却组织大家去露营。比尔郁闷至极,准备从露营地逃跑去参加比赛,没想到他在一间废旧的营房里看到真正的僵尸…… 目录 正文 试读章节 Bonus Round! (Dadadada da daaaaa!!! ) You know, there's one thing I've been forgetting to jot downhere. It's something I've been looking into for months, but I'venever had the chance to really go into it. you see, Morn wasn't always all slouchy and stiff. Last year,she was the star pupil of her Pilates class! When I was little, Iused to put Bricko blocks on her forehead as she did sit-ups just tosee them launched into the air! And when I was in kindergarten,she used to tow my training wheel bike when she jogged! So when middle school started, Mom was pretty still pretty zip-py! But that's also when her new "job" as a medicine test volun-teer for a various companies began. And here's the thing: Morndidn't just volunteer for one company after another. She signed onto volunteer with like three or four of them at the same time! She'dspend two hours every day with the testing staff of each of thosecompany. By the end of that week, she had a bunch of huge pay-checks to cash! I spotted the check stubs on the coffee table. Shemade more in a month than Dad did in half a year! So here's my theory: If one of those companies injected Mornwith the virus, they would probably realize what they had and theywould know that Mom was now a zombie. But if Mom's zombienesscame from a strange combination of all the test chemicals and allthose nonfat, soy lattes she's got in her system...all that would havebeen needed was a jolt of static electricity from the doorknob, andboom! That very same night I became a zombie was the last nightMom cooked up a normal-looking meal for me. By then, she was aplague-bearing playground, and some of her newly evolved zombiegerms made it into my big o1' bowl of mac and cheese! Ugh! Iknew I should have put on some hot sauce! But then, with my luck, the hot-sauced zombie bacteria wouldhave given me super-heated nuclear zombie gas powers instead ofmy normal nuclear zombie gas powers! Just like some of those ra-dioactive superheroes cursing their inconvenient transformations, it'sstill possible to look back at the accident that changed me andthink, "Well, it could have been worse..." Anyway, back to the mac and cheese. It tasted funny, likestyrofoam dipped in plastic cheese oil. At the first bite, I justthought it was maybe a bad noodle or three pushing all the tastyones out of the way to do a stale, bitter elbow drop on my tastebuds.By the third bite, I was beginning to think that Mom was messingwith me or something! I thought she was feeding me some of her weird, homemadewhoda-howda-whadda-heck-IS-this noodles instead of the store-brought dinners I used to ask for. So, I took a few more bites, justbe be sure. But by the time I was on bite number seven, I couldfeel my toes going a little numb, and I decided something wasamiss! I didn't even eat all of it, but I guess by then, the noodles I'd already devoured contained just enough zombie cheese to begintransforming my biology! So Morn totally cleaned off her plate, and after she went to liedown, I dumped my leftovers right into the trash. Then, to cover mytracks--I didn't want Mom to see a pile of noodles in the garbagepail--I volunteered to take the trash out to the dumpster. Just theplace for some ordinary house cats to climb inside and have asnack! So there you have it--my theory of zombie relativity! Some-thing from Mom's old medical testing job, mixed with somethingelse from Mom's old medical testing job or--OR with the soy lattes,which completely worked their caffeinated ways into Mom's systemto create a colony of mutated germs that have modified our humangenes! But are we still contagious? I haven't seen anyone elsechange into a zombie. Maybe you have to eat the zombie germs toget changed. Getting bitten's the classic method--maybe it spreadsthat way. I don't know. But I do know that being in class with azombie, being on a school bus with a zombie, and/or having to smellzombie gas doesn't change you. That is...I don't think it does. I guess we'll just have to wait and see. P196-199 |
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