Foreword by Zhu Ling
Chapter One: It's the Economy 1
1. Don't get carried away with GDP 1
2. Thou shalt not collude on pricing 3
3. Can you monopolize song selection? 5
4. Pork price swing can be minimized 7
5. Food safety officials must be on alert 9
6. Small things make up the big picture 11
7. Reverse brain drain a sign of the times 13
8. 'Urban village' an eyesore in growth 15
Chapter Two: It Takes All Kinds 17
9. Names in stone mark much-deserved appreciation 17
10. Elevator ladies, checkout clerks and the human touch 19
11. Don't treat street vendors as the enemy 21
12. Schlepping for a little respect 23
13. Birth place no yardstick for place of death 25
14. News on the move 27
Chapter Three: Inside the Red Compound 29
15. Oath taken with a pinch of salt 29
16. Sadly, there is an Ah Q in all of us 31
17. Slap on the wrist not enough for lying officials 33
18. 'Shameful' exhibition backfires 35
19. Unconscious reflections of official mind 37
20. The 'rats' just keep nibbling 39
Chapter Four: Rebel without a Cause 41
21. Rebelliousness needs outlets 41
22. Youth facing dilemma of role models 43
23. Don't let gaokao seal your fate 45
24. If it's honest work, what else matters? 47
25. In a hugging league of one's own 49
26. Better teen body image with privacy 51
Chapter Five: In the Wild World of the Web 53
27. Bloggers' revolution is largely overrated 53
28. Let's stop lynching by public opinion 55
29. Cat killers could be given alternatives 57
30. Starbucks in the Forbidden City 59
31. Mr. Mayor, a netizen is calling 61
32. Netizen's arguments do not sit well with real life people 63
Chapter Six: Moral Vortex 65
33. When a pop star went gay bashing 65
34. Suicide as a spectacle 67
35. Advocating coi~lom use does not equal legalizing prostitution 69
36. Soothed feet, clean conscience 71
37. History textbook in soft focus 73
38. Where are our older workers? 75
39. Tiger, tiger! Faking bright 77
Chapter Seven: Sex, Lies and Marriage 79
40. Metrosexuals on the rise 79
41. Don't judge December-May romances 81
42. Forget date rental for new year 83
43. Maid in China 85
44. Sex sells, but tastefulness still vital 87
45. Adult humor has its place among mature 89
46. Hong Kong sex scandal 91
Chapter Eight: Highbrow and Lowbrow 93
47. Arts events for national holidays 93
48. Grand National Theater. Can you afford it? 95
49. Best comedy knows how to tickle audience 97
50. Festival gala as tasteless as chicken ribs 99
51. Too much TV not a good thing 101
52. Don't parade entertainers as role models 103
53. Dabbling in real politics 105
54. Rocker's sad show a lesson to media hounds 107
Chapter Nine: Cherish Our Tradition, Sensibly 109
55. Appreciate Guoxue as it is 109
56. Kneeling is a thing of the past 111
57. Kowtowing not best show of gratitude 113
58. Is the dragon too fearsome a symbol for China? 115
59. Be sincere in preservation of cultural artifacts 117
60. No need to standardize a saint's look 119
61. A memorial service, outsourced 121
62. Yes, Spring Festival is truly golden 123
63. Chunyun provides a glimpse of China's reality 125
Chapter Ten: Language Matters 127
64. Hyperbole in advertising 127
65. Hyperbole in advertising: redux 129
66. Platitude overload depreciates language 131
67. Cutting out the waffle in speeches 133
68. Taking pride in our accents 135
69. Variety in name not a bad thing 137
70. Those addresses, they keep changing 139
71. A learning fad that's truly crazy 141
72. Make English learning less agonizing 143
Chapter Eleven: When East and West interact 145
73. What is really behind a TV reality show? 145
74. Messages behind Gates' dinner 147
75. Look into my eyes when you talk 149
76. Applaud or not, that is the question 151
77. Spotlight on real China is not offensive 153
78. From Kundera to Dostoyevsky 155
79. When aesthetic standards diverge 157
80. Skin-deep translation may mislead 159
Chapter Twelve: When East and West Collide 161
81. A Chinese has no right to sculpt Martin Luther King? 161
82. Men from China in a bull shop 163
83. Zhao Yan beating case 165
84. Kenneth Eng's racist lunacy 167
85. Virginia Tech killing 169
86. Exporters between rock and hard place 171
87. Gun-toting French executive 173
Chapter Thirteen: In the Mood for Humor 175
88. A sure-fire plan to lure pirates to my books 175
89. Year of the Pig 177
90. The Louisiana Purchase 179
91. Dance of the catkins 181
92. The age of flaunting 183
93. Arrested in Hong Kong - almost 185
94. My notebook died 187
95. Leaving a trail of dim sum like Hansel's trail of breadcrumbs 189
96. A tip for conversation etiquette 191
97. Bei-jingle bells ring in my kind of Christmas 193
98. Haven for has-beens 195
99. Curse of the white tile 197
Afterword 197
Acknowledgments 200